The Perfectly Imperfect Halloween

CandyWrappersDid you have the perfect Halloween this past weekend? What does the perfect Halloween look like to you? Seeing the neighbor kids all dressed up? Going to a party and winning a prize for best costume? For me it was a quiet night at home with my husband meeting new neighbors and their children. This was our first Halloween in our new home. And it would have been perfect if I hadn’t eaten so much of that candy!

In Brene Brown’s book The Gifts of Imperfection she reminds us that “Perfectionism is self-destructive simply because there is no such thing as perfect. Perfectionism is an unattainable goal. Additionally, perfectionism is more about perception – we want to be perceived as perfect. Again, this is unattainable – there is no way to control perception, regardless of how much time and energy we spend trying.”

I’ve spent much of my life trying to be perfect and have to work hard at honoring my imperfections the way Ms. Brown invites us to do. I realize now that I was just trying to gain acceptance and approval all those years. Brene also tells us that one of the best ways to counter perfectionism is with self-compassion. Owning our imperfections and being kind towards ourselves when we make mistakes is the first step to self-compassion. Ok, so I ate too much candy. Then I had a choice to accept what I could not change and move on.

So, as soon as the last of the Trick-or-Treaters was gone, my husband and I threw away the remaining candy. And then I walked it out to the garbage can, just to make sure I didn’t get it back out of the kitchen trash can (please tell me that I’m not the only person to have done that before). That was the choice I made after my previous choice of eating lots of Halloween candy. I’m choosing to be kind to myself and acknowledging me for what I did well, rather than continuing to berate myself for what I didn’t do well.

I think I had an perfectly imperfect Halloween. How about you?

Wear High Heels in the Kitchen

Fuzzy Red Socks – A Journey Towards Health

I bought some new shoes last week for a special event. It was a black tie affair and I don’t wear high heels very often, so it made sense when my husband suggested I wear them around the house just to make sure I could walk in them before I decided to keep them.

I’m not sure what gave me the idea to shed my blue jeans and don my sexy, short, black, silk robe, but that’s exactly what happened. And what better way to try out the shoes but by doing something that would keep me on my feet in my home – like making dinner? My thought process went something like this: “If I’m going to wear these elegant sleek black gorgeous shoes while working in the hot kitchen, I might as well look hot myself, right?”

Then I thought, “Wow, this is fun. I feel like a mix of Desperate Housewives and a little bit of June Cleaver.” Turns out the shoes were quite comfortable and as my robe started to slip and show a little cleavage, I felt like a million bucks.

Of course, I was brought back down to earth very quickly when my husband and teenage daughter came into the kitchen for dinner. In my high heels and slinky robe, and with a big smile on my face, I served up veggie burgers and broccoli – while they exchanged a surprised look that suggested not only had I lost my jeans and t-shirt, I’d lost my mind.

Although I suggest giving your family a little bit of warning before you do it, I highly recommend wearing high heels in the kitchen. In addition to feeling great about the meal you’ve just prepared for your family and served up in style, you’re guaranteed to feel really great about yourself.